broken: so many pieces

i'm having a really tough time just thinking about putting the pieces back together. it's long over due. but i just don't know how. i don't know how to be a sister. i've never had that relationship, although i've had one for sixteen years now. it's just so complicated and this whole time i've tried to ignore it. i thought, just maybe it would fix itself, but who am i kidding. she's headed down the wrong path, and here i am counting my blessing that i'm not around to watch that. that's horrible of me. it kills me inside to see this. i honestly don't know what would fix this...no clue.